Greetings beloved cousins, assorted friends, and a special salutation to my vast collectivity of fellow ne’er-do-wells. I do hope this dispatch finds you all uplifted regarding the approaching hiatus we all hold dear – the weeeekend. Yes, I took the liberty of adding a couple of vowels to help solidify and illustrate my unbridled (bordering on embarrassing) excitement regarding the forthcoming 48 hour reprieve.
Is it because we are all nurtured by the assurance that we get the chance to recharge and escape the ball and chain of our labors, emails, texts, dreadful water cooler hyperbole? “No,” I retort, almost snickering at the heinous predictability of that notion.
Perhaps it is that you are so looking forward to destroying that beautiful piece of $8 a pound rib-eye for your idiot brother-in-law on the grill. “No,” I say with growing conviction, yet still friendly.
Maybe it’s because you have been jumping on one foot and the other giddy to clean the gutters and rake leaves. “Ha,” we all full-throated chortled at that stupidity, even my PhD friends.
Of course!! It is because we will “fall back” and we will get that extra hour of sleep only to get up and head off to work Monday in the pitch black. “Tsk-tsk-tsk,” not even close.
Truth be told, we are all slap-happy that the long hair-pulling, snot-slinging, cluster-gaggle of an election cycle will mercifully come to an end, for at least a day or two. This campaign, no inquisition really, reminded me of a fond childhood memory.
When I was a kid my folks used to take us up to visit relatives in STL, which always meant trip to the Zoo. I remember watching the chimps watch us, watching them sling poop at each other and how the gathered crowd would laugh and laugh. The monkeys understood and seemingly buoyed by the reaction, they just gave us more and more. What a spectacle. As I sat thru this endless, mind-numbing election cycle, it took me back to my childhood and the zoo. Still a spectacle but not nearly as funny as when I was a kid. *SIGH*
SO beloved, rejoice! There is light at the end of the tunnel and it isn’t a train! Nurture the weekend, go to church, rake the yard, fire up the grill and oh, remember to set your clocks back. We will all have our lives back soon enough and hopefully the pols will all take very long showers to get the stench off.
Actually, I am most happy for my poor mailman. He will now be able to deliver the mail in his traditional mail pouch rather than having to push a wheelbarrow filled with a load of Good-God-Almighty-Daily-Mailers from all our political hopefuls.
Oh, while getting back to your wonderful weekend, if you perchance have an extra steak, just knock the horns off of it and put it on the plate. I like mine very rare, surprised?